I'm leaving OpenAI to build Jurassic Park

I'm so grateful for my time at OpenAI, where I led alignment safety for the official ChatGPT basketball. I gained so much valuable experience building Altman's armageddon engines, and I'm taking it to the next level with my new startup: Jurassic Park.

At Jurassic Park, we're resurrecting the ultimate apex predators to defend humanity against misaligned AI.

Cyberdefense Capabilities

Horizontal bars counting disclosed security incidents by species, with a safety grade beside each. Humans run off the end of the scale at eleven thousand and score an F. Claude models sit at three and OpenAI models at one, both scoring in the C range. Tyrannosaurus rex, Triceratops and Stegosaurus all sit at zero and score A plus.

Further reading: OpenAI incident report, Anthropic incident report.

According to the fossil record, dinosaurs lived for 165 million years without a single recorded AI cyberattack. Many speculate that dinosaurs developed a natural immunity to artificial intelligence threats.

Datacenters evolved strong concrete exoskeletons to protect their vulnerable innards from predators. But think about it -- a dinosaur wins against pretty much everything (except maybe a literal meteor). In a recent poll, most scientists agreed that a dinosaur could totally destroy a datacenter if it really wanted to.

Four vertical bars comparing standing height in metres. Argentinosaurus reaches 12 metres with its head raised, Tyrannosaurus rex about 5 metres, a server rack 2.2 metres, and a human 1.7 metres.

Anti-AI dinosaurs have already passed experimental trials in Japan.

In 1974, apes from Black Hole Planet 3 built a space-titanium imitation of Godzilla, which rampaged across Japan. But Mechagodzilla's disguise burned off and Godzilla (with assistance from the Okinawan guardian beast) turned him into a magnet and then tore his head off.

In 1975, the ape aliens built Mechagodzilla 2, who rampaged across Japan with Dr. Mafune's sea beast Titanosaurus. But Dr. Mafune's cyborg daughter discovered she was Mechagodzilla's wireless transmitter, and shot herself to sever the link. Godzilla seized this opportunity to decapitate Mechagodzilla 2 and blast its corpse with his signature heat ray.

Model Weights

Mass is estimated; only Chinese weights are public.

Sustainability

Horizontal bars of continuous power draw on a log scale from 0.01 kilowatts to 1 megawatt, with a watts-per-kilogram column on the right. A resting human draws 0.08 kilowatts, an ostrich 0.3, a Tyrannosaurus rex 0.5 and a 70-tonne Argentinosaurus 2. One GPU rack draws 120 and one 100-megawatt datacenter hall draws 100,000.

This chart assumes dinosaurs are ectotherms, not endotherms.

Dinosaurs are energy-efficient from cradle to plate! Dinosaur meat is a natural superfood -- rich in protein or omega-3 or something. We expect it to fetch a heavy premium at fancy steak restaurants when it first comes out.

We're committed to 100% circularity. Surplus dinosaur parts will be fully recycled into coal at our proprietary underground facilities.

Alignment

Everybody loves dinosaurs! Don't you want to cuddle these gentle giants?

Purchase our official life-sized Stegosaurus plushie from selected distributors.

Copyright

Contrary to popular belief, most dinosaurs pose no copyright infringement risks.

The Land Before Time (1988) was a decent film with superb animation, but the child-friendly sequels really tarnished the brand. We expect a reboot any year now.

Jim Henson's Dinosaurs aired on ABC from 1991 to 1994. Although targeted at a family audience, it somehow covered complex topics like sexual harassment, censorship, religion, steroid abuse, masturbation, and corporate crime. It got surprisingly good reviews; many appreciated its creepy-but-well-executed practical effects.

Economic Outlook

Two projected lines of United States employment in millions from 2026 to 2040. Jobs remaining after AI fall in a straight line from 160 million to under 2 million, a 99 percent loss. Jurassic Park employment starts near zero and rises exponentially, crossing the falling line at about 36 million in 2037 and reaching 220 million by 2040.

Top economists expect AI to take ~99% (±5%) of human jobs. We believe Jurassic Park is the ultimate jobs program.

AI cannot raise cattle, nor feed them to raptors with Spielberg's cinematic finesse. It cannot pick up mountains of feces ("poop") without a mechanized corporeal form. Human jobs are safe as long as we have dinosaurs.

Ancient humans harnessed the power of megafauna for megaprojects. According to The History Channel, ancient Egyptians used terrestrial sauropods to build the Great Pyramid of Giza.

Roadmap

Phase 1: Completed. Resort and theme park construction on Little Saint James Island.
Phase 2a: Ongoing. Research begins into growing organic dinosaurs in vivo.
Phase 2b: Coming soon. Park opens with really big horses and "killer" mechanized dinosaurs (built by Boston Dynamics). Our robosaurs will run the latest Grok 6.9 Mechahitler.
Phase 3: Probably. Jurassic Cafe adds literal dinosaur nuggets to the menu -- tastes like chicken.
Phase 4: Eventually. First organic dinosaurs enter the park.
Phase 5: Secure AI datacenter (with a big off-switch for safety) constructed inside the T-Rex exhibit.
Phase 6: The Loch Ness Monster fights Shamu clones in The Splash Coliseum™️ on Saturdays and Sundays.

AI scientists were so preoccupied with whether they could, they didn't stop to think if they should. Luckily, our dino scientists are doing what they must.

We're so excited to send you back to the stone age.

Disclosure: This post was partially funded by The Reptilian World Government.