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Against the Advice of My Superintelligence

Yesterday, my pocket computer told me to volunteer an extra 20 minutes on my commute. I ignored its advice; I spent an extra 45 minutes circumnavigating a horrific freeway closure.

My wrist computer advises me to exercise, wash my hands, and avoid loud noises. No thanks -- call me old-fashioned, but I prefer heart disease, germs, and hearing-loss.

The doctors/scientists said I should exercise more and drink less and sleep more and eat less (but sometimes more) and definitely floss more.

My parents told me to stay away from cigarettes. My teachers encouraged me to meet my full potential. My attorney begged me not to speak about The Taco Bell Incident.

Yet here I am (despite my best efforts).

And there they are. More people. Smarter people.

Solicited advice is rare because people don’t solicit advice. All this time I could’ve asked my friends/family how to be happier. But I avoid honest feedback. I elect to "flop [sic] around and find out". No flashlight -- at full speed, I will navigate this dark landscape entirely with my big toe, which is now gnarled beyond medical intervention (and divine intervention).

And here they come. More computers. Smarter computers.

Instead of listening to the brilliant machines, I will instruct them to send emails, add reminders, set kitchen timers, schedule appointments, and add reminders. I inevitably spend more time on my computer than with the humans, but it’s all just big stupid data. They don’t know me.

Of course, trusting superintelligent advice is the smart strategy. But I wouldn’t need the advice if I was smart, would I?

You see, if I was smart, I would (1) write down exactly what I want from life, (2) ask the smartest humans/computers how to achieve it, (3) try out the sagest strategies, (4) seek feedback, and (5) repeat.

The machines aren’t very wise (yet), but they continue to mine collective human wisdom from AskReddit the internet.

If I’m smart, I’ll listen to those machines. I’ll feed them all the available data/context. I’ll confide in them all the truths that I couldn’t bear to speak aloud. I’ll ask them what to do next: now, tomorrow, 5 years from now, ad finitum. I’ll ask them exactly how to become myself, or maybe trust them enough to become somebody else entirely.

But today the only machines I listen to are those darn recommendation algorithms, because they keep showing me who I want to be right now.

I’m apparently surrounded by like-minded people. If humans were smart, we’d listen to the smart people. We’d use our unprecedented abundance to fix the climate, malaria, elections, pollution, etc. But we’re not smart. 50% of people will remain dumber than the average person. And 100% of us will pretend like we’re not the problem.

Some of us inevitably usurp power via elections/money/force/whatever. Unfortunately, powerful people are confident decision-makers, and confident decision-makers are notoriously bad listeners.

And so you, and your friends, and your acquaintances, and your owners, and your owners’ owners, and your owners’ owners’ computers will all ignore each other. We’ll call this new phenomenon "ignorance".

When the machines wise up, they’ll be right to leave us behind.

Until then, maybe I’ll learn to listen. Maybe I’ll seek advice. Maybe I’ll collaborate with the computers. I’ll stop fighting friends. I’ll investigate beliefs. I’ll pay professionals to train me. I’ll engage in honest conversation. I’ll get educated. I’ll get help. I’ll help others. I’ll do boring stuff. I’ll exercise patience. I’ll focus. And I’ll probably start tomorrow-ish.