[![toilet garden](/toilet-garden.jpg)](https://www.instructables.com/Toilet-Garden/)

![cardboard planter](/cardboard-box-planter.jpg.webp)

![oyster mushrooms](/oyster-box.png)

# The Lazy Garbage Nursery Guide

1. [Don't work hard.](#lazy)
2. [Make space.](#space)
3. [Reuse containers.](#containers)
4. [Save seeds.](#seeds)
5. [Collect compost.](#compost)
6. [Forget watering.](#water)
7. [Share.](#share)

## 1. Don't work hard. {lazy}

If you have waste and space, you're wasting space.

Transform scraps into food and foliage! Spend zero dollars and a few hours per
year making plants.

Don't overthink it. Don't sink a bunch of time into it. Don't dive into research
rabbit-holes and artificially sate your curiosity.

Failed experiments beat daydreams.

## 2. Make space. {space}

You can grow plants in a frontyard, balcony, window, garage, alley, etc.

If space is limited, ask friends and family
[to donate space in exchange for produce](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sharecropping).

## 3. Reuse containers. {containers}

Cardboard and plastics are valuable materials. Don't give them away for free!

- Use clear plastic bottles and containers
  [to root cuttings in water](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cutting_%28plant%29).
- Use large cardboard boxes and garbage-bag-liners as makeshift garden beds or
  drip trays.
- Poke holes in the bottoms of other plastic containers and set in larger drip
  trays.
- [Grow potatoes in cardboard boxes.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qUGXSetN5wc)
- Use medium-sized plastic bags for mushrooms and larger plants.
- Consider shredded paper or cardboard
  [as a mushroom substrate](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qt4rO3KxW_k).

## 4. Save seeds. {seeds}

All fruits come with baby bonus plants inside. Vegetables regrow themselves from
severed organs. Plants are weird.

- [Save seeds.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seed_saving)
- Barter yardwork services [on Craigslist](https://craigslist.org) for seeds and
  cuttings.
- [Revive kitchen scraps](https://www.urbancultivator.net/regrow-vegetable-cuttings)
  -- even [mushrooms](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VjxcV6O_WyU).
- [Reuse bouquets.](https://www.hunker.com/13426382/how-to-regrow-already-cut-flowers)
- Obtain cuttings via friends, neighbors, or
  [piracy](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Proplifting).

## 5. Collect compost. {compost}

Soil is brown gold. Hoard organic material and
[let it rot](https://www.amazon.com/Let-Rot-Composting-Down-Earth/dp/1580170234/ref=sr_1_1).

- You can compost
  [with garbage bags](https://www.wanderinghoofranch.com/compost-in-a-black-garbage-bag/)
  or use a [fancy tumbler](https://www.amazon.com/s?k=compost+tumbler).
- Ask neighbors if you can collect their compost on a weekly basis.
- [Become a worm rancher!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CvCCuvi6eHw)
- Borrow a friend's truck to get free dirt
  [on Craigslist](https://craigslist.org).

## 6. Forget watering. {watering}

Plants combine carbon dioxide and water to make glucose. Plants use glucose as
both fuel and building materials.

- Use
  [the Kratky method (hydroponic)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KWUirDxgavc)
  to grow plants in a bucket without soil.
- Normalize neglect! It's okay to leave plants outside and pray for rain.
- You can connect a drip system to a
  [backyard rainwater resevoir](https://www.tank-depot.com/rainwater-tanks/).
- Strategically place pots next to existing sprinklers.
- Put [a drip resevoir](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B09SBG1KJ3/) next to
  your kitchen sink.
- Make [a toilet garden](https://www.instructables.com/Toilet-Garden/).

## 7. Share. {share}

With just one plant, you can clone an army of plants!

- [Plant legal plants in illegal places.](http://www.guerrillagardening.org)
- [Plant illegal plants in legal places.](https://www.complex.com/pop-culture/a/lewis-scrafton/elderly-woman-grew-huge-cannibas-plant-bbc)
- [Give plants to cats.](/catnip.png)