# the best bad baby names

Hello, I'm [Taylor Troesh](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trailer_trash),
connoisseur of crap.

[Naming things](https://martinfowler.com/bliki/TwoHardThings.html) is already
hard, and I'm here to make things harder:

- **Aaaron**: Your child could be an alphabetic god!
- **Arlo**: Sounds like a typeface.
- **Ellamenope**: "...E-F-G-LMNOP -- hey, I know that girl!"
- **Grover**: It's a cool name; don't shoot the messenger.
- **Ivy Lee**: She's going to Harvard!
- **Lemony**: It will always be an unfortunate event.
- **assorted "M" names**: Matilda, Miriam, Mildred, Melody, Mercury, Micah,
  Merlin
- **Taylor Jr.**: I wanted to name my daughter Taylor Jr. but I got vetoed by,
  uh, everybody.
- **Vii**: It's cool because it can be pronounced "vee", "vy", or "seven".
- **Xi**: Another pronouncable roman numeral -- "she" or "eleven".

---

Bonus names from [Jacob Filipp](https://jacobfilipp.com):

> - Guerlaine: "She's a girl and her name says it!". Sadly overruled by my wife.
> - Kyle: Try saying it without sounding in pain.
> - Assorted "Man" names for a girl: Amanda, Samantha, Armani, Manon.
> - Rex is due for a revival. As a Canadian, I can only picture Rex
>   [looking like this](https://www.google.com/search?q=rex+murphy&sclient=img&udm=2).
> - Rexanne. Only fair if Rex is back...
> - "Job names": Fletcher, Carter, Mason, Cooper ...
>   [Boniface, Avowry, Granger, Eggler, Lorimeri](https://www.familyresearcher.co.uk/glossary/Dictionary-of-Old-Occupations-Index.html)...
>   Taylor (sorry!). A pejorative term coined by my mother who was a British
>   Baronet in a past life.